SELF INDULGENT CAUSE I CAN AND I’M BORED AS SHIT AND I REALLY WANTED TO DO SOMETHING WITH TWAIMZ’S CRUSH SONG AND IT’S CINCO DE MAYO AND I CAN DO WHAT I WANT CAUSE I’M A B.A.B.

THIS IS TOTALLY A CRACK ASS ROLEPLAY FOR FUN THAT CAN TOTALLY GO FROM PG-13 TO R (IF YA’LL WANT) I AM SO STRAIGHT FOR DRIFT’S THIGHS LIKE, YOU HAVE NO IDEA

(To clarify, I’d be playing Drift, and you, Ratchet.)

He didn’t want  to be here. He didn’t like how loud these parties got, but he went anyway. Why? Because Rodimus was his best friend, that and he was curious to see if Ratchet actually showed up. Rodimus had pestered the medic to take a break and party, but he had gotten himself and Drift thrown out of the medbay.

Drift sighed and sipped on a very watered down glass of energex. He was bored out of his dammed mind while Rodimus was off doing Primus knows what. “Drift, can you please come to the karaoke stage!!” A voice practically screeched over the bar’s intercom. Heads turned and stared at the hunched over SIC. He let out a long sigh as he got up and shuffled his way to the stag and up the stairs. “Yes Rodimus?” he grumbled. His friend grinned and batted his eyes. “Can you to ‘the song’~? The crew wants to hear it~” he cooed.

Drift’s cheeks heated up before he rubbed his face. “Fine…but you fragging owe me big time…” he grumbled before Rodimus fist pumped and gave a thumbs up to Blaster as he rushed off the small stage. Drift flipped him a not so nice gesture before the music started. Drift had a bored look on his face before he slowly smirked as every bot in the room looked confused.

The swordmech’s smirk widened before the music got to the starting spot. “Hush, hush, hush. Blush, blush, blush. You are now my big fat crush!” he started, doing little dramatic poses that made some bots look baffled. “I’m single as I can be. you’re single, perfect for me. I’m gonna give you a bunch of reasons why you should date me.” he continued, thot-dropping that made the rest of the bots whistle. (Cause Drift’s thighs are amazing). Drift did suggestive poses and dance moves while he was on the stage. “Reason number one – I’m super hot, reason number two – he’s super not, reason number three – I’m all you got and all you got is someone hot”

Ratchet (you) watched in baffled awe as he stood in the bar’s door way. Was that fragging Drift? Singing really well? And dancing?  He must’ve inhaled too much medical cleanser or something. He watched as he stumbled his way to his table where Ambulon and First Aid were. He was captivated by those curvy hips and thighs. Holy shit those thighs. “Boy check my resume. You want a background check, okay. First name hot, and last name bitch. Wanna get with me? Now that’s the sitch. You think I’m trash? Hell no, I’m class and I got a big fat ass.” Drift sassed as he turned away from the crowd and thot-dropped again, showing off his curves and how flexible he was. Ratchet choked on his drink that made Ambulon laugh knowingly. The older medic’s faceplates were a dark pink.

“Please date me because I’m single! S-I-N-G-L-E. Love me and hug me, and touch me and, well, fuck me!” Drift finished, striking a final pose with his fingers in a v-shape in front of his intake with his glossa out while the music stopped. It was silent for a click before everyone cheered. Drift looked smug as all hell as he made his way off the stage, swaying his hips. “Damn that felt good. I feel a lot better.” he hummed as approached Rodimus. The captain looked in awe as he laughed. “I’m sure you do man!” he said, patting his shoulder. Drift’s smirk never left as stalked towards the medics’ table, making Ambulon and First Aid snicker and dart off, leaving Ratchet to his own devices. Drift’s smirk faded into a kind smile, as if he hadn’t been dirty dancing.

Drift sat beside Ratchet with a hum. “Hey Ratchet. How are you tonight?” he chirped.

How does Ratchet react, or say?  

(I am not fucking sorry for this.)